It Takes a Village

We are at the end of Women’s History Month and the list of women worthy of our admiration and esteem is long. Fortunately, new names keep being added to the list, and even though many wins are still in the waiting, there are also great victories worth celebrating. 

Women from all parts of the world serve as great inspiration for what they do, for who they are, and for the way they show up for their cause in life. Role models come in many shapes and forms. Some add tremendous value without drawing much attention to their person. Others consciously and deliberately seek to leverage the platform they have built for themselves.     

A great example of this is the founder of Spanx, Sarah Blakely, who is someone who I return to for inspiration and encouragement on my journey as a female entrepreneur. What is of course impressive about Sarah Blakely is her ability to build a company that is valued at $1.2 billion from the ground up.

But what inspires and makes me return to Sarah Blakely is her willingness to share her journey and her dedication to keep pushing a more transparent and vulnerable approach to leadership. Whether I am watching her MasterClass series or following her on social media, she keeps reminding me of how interesting, disarming and ultimately appealing it can be to also have access to someone’s “backstage area”.  

One of the things I learn from studying the great achievements of others is how they have all “taken a village”. In fact, all the extraordinary initiatives that I can think of, are the result of some kind of collaborative effort.   

Recently, my daughter Laura and I had the opportunity to experience the great work of French fashion and design icon Thierry Mugler at the Brooklyn Museum in New York City. Throughout his life, Mugler got the chance to dress many of the trailblazing women we all know, just as his lifelong homage to women has rightfully earned a much-deserved place in history. 

Besides getting this unique chance to observe the stunning beauty of his many creations, I was again struck by what is possible when a strong vision,  sense of purpose, great talent, and abundant creativity come together in a perfect symphony. But what I also took away from this great exhibit was a deeper understanding of how Mugler’s story reflected the support of many talented and resourceful people. 

Although Mugler performed on a whole different scale and was a giant star in an industry very different from mine, his journey reaffirms how we all need people around us to realize our full potential and dreams. To me, part of his great legacy is his reminder to keep looking for ways to let your personal mission tap into the energy and talent of others to help you shine and support you where you fall short. 

When I first began creating  From Balance back in 2020, I reached out to great friends, colleagues, and people that related to my vision at a very early stage (without any of us seeing the entire picture yet): People who knew me very well - both in terms of what I am capable of and what I longed to create.

I thought of the group as my Ohana and those who are familiar with Hawaiian culture (or simply are familiar with the Disney classics) will know that ‘’Ohana’’ represents one's extended family and support system. 

The From Balance Ohana never consisted of a fixed number of people nor were any of them sought for the same kind of feedback or advice. Right from the beginning and to this very day, the Ohana has served as a fluid and informal sounding board for new ideas and initiatives. 

As I have shared before, my strive for perfection often holds me back from asking for help when I really need it. Truth be told, I am far better at asking for support on matters where I feel relatively confident than in parts of my business where I struggle the most. Instead of getting out of my own way by asking for the support I need, I sometimes find myself spending time on things other people could have done way better and faster than me. Understanding where my talent lies and acknowledging what I am not so great at is a lesson that I am still learning. 

In her latest book “Atlas of the Heart'', researcher and author Brené Brown talks about the Buddhist concept of near enemies. Different from far enemies (which represent the total opposite of what we try to achieve), Brown explains, how near enemies are those qualities which on the surface appear similar or like nuances of what we are striving for but often undermine our practices. 

In my case, never reaching out to anyone would be the far enemy of me trying to get support from my network. But my near enemy (and what often gets in my way of asking for the help that I actually need most) is my attempt to appear competent and on top of things. 

Our near enemies prevent us from showing the kind of vulnerability that will allow other people to truly see you and understand what kind of help you need. Knowing that being in control is sometimes the near enemy of my personal and professional development helps me pay attention to this. Changing it, however, is part of a lifelong personal journey, that I uncover one step at a time. 

As a female entrepreneur, who creates her own concepts and offers, I draw inspiration from many different sources. “If you can see it, you can be it!” is a mantra adorning many t-shirts and posters and which holds a lot of validity. At times you are lucky to come across just the right role model but often what or who you dream of doing or being, does not exist (yet!). 

These are the moments in life when you want to look for role models who can inspire you and work on getting your “dream team” in place! Your dream team are the people who can inspire you to think bigger and bolder and who can encourage you to keep going and help you reach important milestones. It is the kind of people who are ready to listen carefully to the problem you are trying to solve and help you distill the essence of your ideas. 

Each day I gain more and more clarity on who these people are for me and how my near enemies sometimes prevent me from letting them get close enough. Do you know who your ''village'' is composed of? And what are the near enemies perhaps holding you back, I wonder?

With Love,

Sille